Why should we confront our fears?
Because I am my parent’s only child, I am accustomed to always getting my way. My parents have always shielded me from the evils of the world, or perhaps from the practicalities of life since I was a child. My parents never revealed anything about my low academic achievement, terrible behavior at home, or escape from a boarding school!
As I grew older, I became accustomed to the safe haven offered by my parents, particularly my mother. Things proceeded from terrible behaviour at home to bad behaviour at work, a lack of security in my career, and a reliance on my parents that was permanent. My parents, with the exception of a few lectures, seldom spoke anything. Perhaps they believed I would blossom later in life, or perhaps they simply continued to shelter me because I was their only child.
My father died when I was 30, and my mother’s life was turned upside down. Nonetheless, my behaviour became increasingly irregular as I grew accustomed to relying on both of them. I yelled at my mother at various moments since I didn’t like working. I despised the fact that we were both alone, oblivious to my mother’s terrible health and medical demands. I kept battling with her for no apparent reason. She put up with all of my whims and fancies without saying anything and even got me married.
Then, in early April of this year, covid struck our family, turning my life upside down. My mother was admitted to the hospital for a regular checkup, which escalated into an ICU stay in which her breathing capacities were dependent on a machine. I was taken aback and didn’t know what to say. I screamed, wailed, and felt helpless. It was at that point that I realised how much responsibility my mother had carried for virtually her whole life.
My mother survived the COVID attack and was released from the intensive care unit three months later. She was pleased that I had managed to keep afloat during her absence. This humbling event has taught me that putting off dealing with my problems would only make things worse, as it almost did for me.
